Genie...

[Gilgamesh]

Let's all rub the magic lamp!!

[tessspoon]

Nobody gets MY lamp; I just got it.

[Yonkey]

"We're sorry.  The genie you have reached is not in service.  Please check the lamp and try your rub again.  This is a recording."

[Delling]

You get three wishes with the following caveats and addendums:

All wishes are non-refundable. Fulfillment of a wish is not gauged by customer satisfaction. Should your wish create some sort of problem for you, we're sorry, but perhaps you should wish for a cheap psychiatrist or other aid. Genie is not responsible for satisfaction, enjoyment, gratification, experience (good or otherwise), or death resulting from a wish. Genie may not kill, maim, or otherwise physically damage another person than the wisher without written consent and proof of cognizance of consequence of action: if you'd like to wish yourself harm, be our guest. No wish will result in harm if not requested within the wish itself.

You are allowed a total of three wishes. There is no wishing for more wishes. No wish may affect the established system of wishes and wishing. To command a wish, the wisher must state: "I wish that..." or similar construction. Should the genie grant a wish not so commanded, said wish is counted in the total count of three.

Wishing to free the genie results in a lifetime service as a genie. Hey, we're not handing out free genies here!

[tessspoon]

You get three wishes with the following caveats and addendums:

All wishes are non-refundable. Fulfillment of a wish is not gauged by customer satisfaction. Should your wish create some sort of problem for you, we're sorry, but perhaps you should wish for a cheap psychiatrist or other aid. Genie is not responsible for satisfaction, enjoyment, gratification, experience (good or otherwise), or death resulting from a wish. Genie may not kill, maim, or otherwise physically damage another person than the wisher without written consent and proof of cognizance of consequence of action: if you'd like to wish yourself harm, be our guest. No wish will result in harm if not requested within the wish itself.

You are allowed a total of three wishes. There is no wishing for more wishes. No wish may affect the established system of wishes and wishing. To command a wish, the wisher must state: "I wish that..." or similar construction. Should the genie grant a wish not so commanded, said wish is counted in the total count of three.

Wishing to free the genie results in a lifetime service as a genie. Hey, we're not handing out free genies here!

lol!

[Petra Rocks]

You get three wishes with the following caveats and addendums:

All wishes are non-refundable. Fulfillment of a wish is not gauged by customer satisfaction. Should your wish create some sort of problem for you, we're sorry, but perhaps you should wish for a cheap psychiatrist or other aid. Genie is not responsible for satisfaction, enjoyment, gratification, experience (good or otherwise), or death resulting from a wish. Genie may not kill, maim, or otherwise physically damage another person than the wisher without written consent and proof of cognizance of consequence of action: if you'd like to wish yourself harm, be our guest. No wish will result in harm if not requested within the wish itself.

You are allowed a total of three wishes. There is no wishing for more wishes. No wish may affect the established system of wishes and wishing. To command a wish, the wisher must state: "I wish that..." or similar construction. Should the genie grant a wish not so commanded, said wish is counted in the total count of three.

Wishing to free the genie results in a lifetime service as a genie. Hey, we're not handing out free genies here!

No way I can beat that.

[Pacman928]

*puts dellings label on my lamp*