Male or Female??

[Say]

as I was talking with rob moments ago, the main problem is not to get the thesis done, give in and from now I can totally relax (I wish it would be like that) the problem is that right now is when the hardest comes from me, I have meetings coming and the defense, and i will not only have to put up with him but the gf and my mom will also be around... I'll explain the situation a bit.

My concern are the personal problems that have been crashing from one side to another, because my mom I think its the only aware of all the bullsh*it and crap im going though regarding this, as well as he does hates me I have no doubt of that just for the sake he did part of what he had to hes bitching, hes at a constant whim and what he wants? a cookie? its his thesis too he has to work there is no other way around it, I've worked my ass off since Thesis I and now on Thesis II he does one minimal s*** and he wants a celebration or something, so I bet he has his side of the story, as well as so they may his mom and his ridiculous gf, so the things are horrible between us, he cant talk to me without offending and insulting me, I personally dont feel like picking up on a fight 24/7 so he may insult me all he want now and he may act like the plain a****** he is, Im just not going to reduce to his level on this case, I have no intention to actually, he has hurt me (after hours of insulting eventually it gets to you) but Im not going to start a flame war there is still more to go which apparently he just seems to miss out of perspective, so the fact to even talk to him about thesis without him insulting me is truly an effort, cuz he always does since monday now, and my mom knows and is not very much pleased even though I told her to get the fukz out of it, same with I asume his mom and his gf which have lead to get in the way many many times and I have no idea how he can even allow that to happen, maybe he likes the backup cuz he doesnt have the balls himself, I personally dont know dont care, so, talking all that together to the fact that we still need to prepare the defense... and being there that day all together... yes, Im scared it may turn into a big ugly horrible day honestly, because if something happens my mom will always be my mom and his mom will always be his mom and so related, defense is a special day when you can invite in at least 2 family relatives on each side and 3 friends, so I know from his side he will consider his and I will consider mine, it is important to them so I dont care, they may go, but you know, my point is the bigger troubles are yet ahead.

So its not time to relax, its time to become emotionless and completly cold inside to not let get this to me, it is not going to be easy but Im looking foward to get the fukz out of this s*** once and for all.

[Oldbushie]

Dang. How long does the defense go on for?

[Say]

the defense is actually one day, its a debate of 1 hour exactly, its like you all sit down in a big table and you get asked question from the jury, for an hour  

[Oldbushie]

Ah, I see. Here's hoping that one hour doesn't feel like five hours.

[Say]

it may even feel like a month, the problem is the waiting while this whole thing, and the adminstrative meetings with the correctors and stuff, oh well.

[copycat]

Don't worry Say, allow us, your friends at the KQ IX-community, to be there for you, and make sure you don't break down completely during this stressful time. No that I think you need it per sé, but I think it's better for your emotional state to hang around here on a regular base.

[B'rrr]

Yes!! as often as you can!! ; ) ...no wait! you have to sleep enough and eat good and... <sigh>

hahaha, just take care ; )

[Say]

That's really sweet of you guys, really thanks.

I do admit to hang around here and share this with all of you has helped me out a lot, it is a personal thing but it is certainly an important one, and sometimes the feedback is important, sort of like in this case.

I do feel like Im going to break down at times, because it isnt easy to be "the bigger person" 24/7 when all you had has been nothing but a bad experience thus far regarding such an important feature of your life, which you just consider better to move along to get your goals rather than to stop for inconvenients, the problem is, those "inconvenients" are rather strong and they are freaking tearing me apart at times, because seriously, it doesnt matter that you ocasionally get 1 insult but to get them constantly over stupidity (even if hes nervious, stupid, whatever) is extremely stressful even though if I may or may not be nervious/stressed myself, it is kind of rude and particulary awful to put up with something like this, I do try to keep things in order and peace because Im so busy I cant afford to discuss stupid bull for over hours with him when he doesnt even listens to me, I just need to be strong yes, but it is hard sometimes and Im glad at least I have friends here whom I can share this to and care, so honestly from the bottom of my heart thank you, this means the world to me.

[copycat]

Maybe you could explain something to me. In one of the previous posts I seem to recall you saying you have been placed in some sort of 'special group' because you're so smart. So if you've been teamed up with someone else to do your thesis, I'd think he'd have been chosen because he's so smart too. This doesn't correlate with the fact he's being so difficult about having to do one part out of four.

[koko_99_2001]

I don't know what Say will say, but I what I think is that smart does not mean lazy.  He may be really smart, but lazy b/c he really doesn't want to do it.  (I am not meaning lazy in a bad way--right now it's the only word I can think of to describe what I'm trying to say---maybe slacker, or something like that??)

Cat

[copycat]

I don't know what Say will say, but I what I think is that smart does not mean lazy.  He may be really smart, but lazy b/c he really doesn't want to do it.  (I am not meaning lazy in a bad way--right now it's the only word I can think of to describe what I'm trying to say---maybe slacker, or something like that

Still, he must not have been lazy or a slacker before he got into that special group, because I don't think you'd be let into that group if you were just smart.

[copycat]

Well, my schools didn't have any special "smart" groups. Anway, I'm not book-smart, I'm just smart in general. I think I have a good work ethic, I have social skillks to work in the team and I know how to apply the snippets of knowledge I still know by heart.
I breezed through elementary school, secondary school was a bit harder, and in college I studied on and out of school.

[Yonkey]

I'm pretty similar to you too Jeysie.  I prefer working alone, but when I have to do things in groups I'm ready for it.  The nice thing about group work is that most of the time you're surrounded with competant individuals. So, they not only could do the task as well as you, they might even do things better (this happens way more during university, than high school or elementary).  

The major advantage is that you spend less time working on the assignment, because others work on an equal share of it.  The disadvantage is when there's a slacker in the group and everyone else has to pick up their share.  And as you said, there are often disagreements with group work because everyone has their own idea in their mind of what they think is "best".  

LOL!   I have the exact same work ethic.  When I'm working for someone I'm in this "super hard worker" mode where I try really hard to solve problems to the best of my ability in the most efficient and effective manner.  Unfortunately, depending on the task I could become a perfectionist so after a certain period of time I have to say to myself "That's it!  Stop right here" or I would be improving and improving forever.

When I'm not in that mindset, I become an "extreme slacker" that doesn't want to move, think or do anything that requires much energy.   It's really interesting because I can't stay entirely in one mode or the other.. otherwise I'd go completely insane.  I also can't be in both modes at the same time...

...Actually, when I do KQ9 stuff I think I'm in both modes at the same time.  I fluctuate between having fun and hard work, and it's such a nice balance!  No wonder I'm addicted to this place!

[Jeysie]

The disadvantage is when there's a slacker in the group and everyone else has to pick up their share.  And as you said, there are often disagreements with group work because everyone has their own idea in their mind of what they think is "best".  

Heh. I think there's a third possible disadvantage as well... one I'm running into at work right now, in fact. It can best be summed up as "the blind leading the blind". Namely, we all want to do a certain thing, and we want to work hard, but we don't collectively possess all the knowhow necessary.

The details would just get too long, but suffice it say that it combines the dubious skills of two managers trying to do marketing/advertising stuff who seem to me to not have received real training in it (they know some advance basics, but not really enough for what they're planning, IMHO), and a file clerk who has somehow found herself as a sort of "office computer guru", despite the fact that any person with real computer know-how would laugh at her being described as such.

Peace & Luv, Liz

[Jeysie]

Hee, oops, maybe some details would help. (Yeah, I was awake at 3AM again. Go neighbors! )

For one, this is a teeny company, about 15 people, most of whom have been there for years. The people trying to do this are the "head honchos". (The president and his vice-president, basically.)

For two, we're not really doing broad advertising, we're doing an e-mail newsletter. We've done some brainstorming to figure out what to put in a newsletter, but we sort of ended up with a consensus of, "Well, we'll wing it."

The biggest issue is the tech stuff. We have this sales database program thingy. Basically we want to take the address and company info that people who visit our website put into our feedback forms, and make a database of that. Problem is, I know it's technically feasible to pull the feedback info into a flagged text file to import into the database. I just have no idea technically how to set that up. Our website is run by an off-site contracted company, for one. For two, I don't know much about web database stuff yet anyway. So we figured, OK, we'll just read the feedback e-mails from within the database program, and I'll copy them in manually. I actually got that figured out, only to figure out that the program has no way of sending through a secure server, which sort of defeats the purpose. Argh. So now I guess I'd have to figure out how to hook it into Outlook.

Of course, the whole reason we bothered using the database program to begin with was because nobody knew how to use Outlook for mass mailings where there was no way for the recipients to see each other's address, or accidentally reply to each other. (If you use BCC, I think that everyone can actually receive a person's reply, if the replying person is doofy enough to use "Reply all".)

Add into this the fact that my station is running Win95, and the database needs Win98, so I have to work with the program on someone else's station, which is only available to me for about a half-hour each day. Yech.

Problem is, I'm seriously the one in the office with the most computer knowledge. Everyone else either treats their computer like a "mysterious black box that works when I push the right buttons and say incantations" or there are a couple people slightly lower than me in computer knowledge. And they're too cheap... uh, I mean, cost-effective to call their computer people to figure it out.

I mean, I'm not dumb... I could teach myself the skills they need IF I had a few weeks to tinker for a few hours a day, and stuff. In fact, I would like to teach myself web and off-line databasing and stuff at some point anyway. But, I mean, learning in a half-hour a day, with nobody more knowledgable to ask for help (without paying a few appendages), when I'm supposed to be just an $8.50/hour *file clerk* anyway? It's a little frustrating.

Peace & Luv, Liz

[racx_00]

Why hasnt anbody else posted their gender , cos i wanted to see the females win and the males lose

[Say]

to answer to bob here, the "special smart group" lol doesnt exist, is more like who asked and got granted that privilegue I asked and I got granted, sounds horrible, but hes not that much of a good student, hes a smart guy but too much of a slacker and mediocre, plus is the ONLY ONE at my class that can handle this subject (ecommerce and ebussiness) hence the rest of the class doesnt even knows anything webdesign related.

Anyhow, good news, I gave in thesis on wednesday, and they were going to check it out if it goes for april or july... guess what, I already even got a date!! I defend April 26th at 4:00 pm! yikes

I still need to see how are the administrative meetings with the jury and the thesis office, about the previous corrections from the document by the jury (they do have the final word besides the administrative office  anyways), so let's hope it all goes good and I can totally just go and defend and do good

Im like super happy... stressed out and anxious and stuff... lol

[racx_00]

congratulations Say , knew you could do it

[Say]

omg thankies


now... the REAL stress begins

[racx_00]

Im behind you all the way , or am i in front of you , you know what i mean