Best Twlight Reviews EVER (SPOILERS)

[KatieHal]

You, too, can speak like Kristen Stewart! Find out how!

Also, this is awesome:

IDW Publishing is daring fans to switch to a vampire franchise with some teeth! This year at San Diego Comic-Con, in an unprecedented promotion, fans can turn in any copy of a Twilight book or graphic novel at the IDW booth #2643 for a free copy of a 30 DAYS OF NIGHT graphic novel! IDW is vowing to help vampire fans get back on track with the undead the way they were always meant to be: bloody and terrifying. "Real horror fans have watched vampires systematically turned into wimpy fodder for years now. It's time to fight back" said Niles. "I'm happy to be working with IDW on the Sparkles for Blood event. Hopefully, working together we can put an end to this nightmare."

IDW's exclusive "Sparkles for Blood" outreach program is designed to help all fans of the undead get what they really want - bloody, vampire horror. Sprung from the twisted minds of Steve Niles and Ben Templesmith in 2002, 30 Days of Night graphic novels and major motion pictures offer vampires as the feral, animalistic creatures that stalked humans under cover of night that they really are.

"Recently, vampires in pop culture have started to swing back to the romanticized vamps of other literature and films before 30 Days of Night," said IDW chief creative officer, Chris Ryall. "In some cases, they're even being treated more as chaste immortal teenagers than as the murderous creatures that they are. 'Sparkles for Blood' will remind everyone that vampires are creatures of the night, not of the twilight.

http://www.comicsalliance.com/2011/07/18/twilight-30-days-of-night-exchange-comic-con/

[Enchantermon]

Haha, that's awesome! Kind of reminds me of Chris Rock's gun exchange program too, so it gets even more points. ^_^

[Haids1987]

You, too, can speak like Kristen Stewart! Find out how!

Could they have chosen a girl more terrible to play Bella?!

Oh! Oh!  What's this?!  Is it an enticing teaser poster?!  What in the name of Cullen could this MEAN?!?!?!?!

[LadyTerra]

Bella finally fulfills her dream of going to clown college?

[KatieHal]

You didn't know? That's how all women look when they get teen pregnant.

[Haids1987]

Katie!  You could have slapped a spoiler tag on there!

[KatieHal]

LOL, haven't we already talked openly about that plot development? Besides, the thread title says spoilers--people have been forewarned!

[MikPal]

I'm still waiting for this. Personally I never understood why vampires are supposed to be romantic. Somebody showing two sharp legos on my neck without actually seeing if it will hit a vein. That's like having Junkie McShakyhands taking your blood sample. I would get as much romance if I'd go to the old abandoned factory by the train tracks and get myself in a knife fight with a duche wearing a kerchief and an ascot.

[Haids1987]

I love it!  "Sparkles, Moonbeam..."

(Posted on: August 07, 2011, 04:32:46 PM)

That's like having Junkie McShakyhands taking your blood sample.

Eeeeeeeew, I just noticed this quote.   This reminds me of my giving blood horror story in June.  Wait, did I tell you guys about that?  I don't think I did!  Oooooooooh, story time!  If you have a weak stomach, don't read on.

I'm warning you.

Okay, so I had an appointment to give blood the very last weekend in June.  I go up to the blood bus, get a bed almost immediately, and the girl hands me a squishy foam banana to squeeze every ten seconds.  She jabs me and my blood is flowing, and it's all good.  As she walks past me, I reflexively move my arm away from her so she doesn't bump me, since those hallways in the blood bus are as narrow as the foam banana.  "Oh, Hailey, just so you know, we're trained to be very, versy conscious of donors.  It's in our training to watch out for you, so no need to move away.  We'll adjust ourselves for you." 

Fair enough.  I whipped out my phone and started doing some one-handed texting to my sister: "Donating blood.  Be home in half an hour."  I laid my phone down on my stomach and chilled.  Approximately fifteen seconds after said chilling, a young phlebotomist in training hurried past me.  Oh, and he slammed into my arm and tore the needle out.

I never actually saw my arm as this was happening, but I immediately felt the warmth oozing and pooling in the crook of my elbow.  I remember meeting eyes with the phlebotomist and feeling rather panicked, and I felt my face go white.  Then I looked away and tried to calm my breathing as all the sticky warmth drips down my elbow.  The poor kid was probably younger than I am, and he's like, "AHHHHH! I'm so sorry!  I'm so so so sorry!!  Some-someone come qu-qu-quick and grab gloves, I need help!  Jenny, help me! No, shouldn't you hold her arm first?  You want me to?  Okay, I'm applying pressure..."  Then he looks at me and is all, "Are you okay?  You're not gonna pass out, are you?!  Your face got pretty white!  You're okay, right?!"  By then I was feeling more calm, so I was pretty much like, "Dude, I'm fine.  Please clean me up." 

It finally got to the point where I was all cleaned up and had a pretty pink bandage, but I felt so bad for the poor guy!  He came up to me like five times, apologizing and offering me extra ginger snaps.  The suckiest part was, they couldn't even use the blood I had donated, since the air had contaminated it.   Oh well, it didn't deter me.  I have another appointment in two weeks!

[Arkillian]

I'm glad it didn't deter you. I've donated once. The second time they got me in a nerve and made me faint. I have permanent nerve damage in my left forearm arm. I get pins and needles tapping the inside of my wrists. I wasn't scared of needles till then. Now my left arm from the upper arm down goes onto panic mode if anything sharp come near it

[Haids1987]

Eeeeeeesh! That IS a horror story! I'm sorry, Arkillian.

And Katie, I wasn't addressing the pregnancy issue, I was addressing the spoiler about how all pregnant vampire teens look like Bella. How could you ruin people's fantasties that way!

[Arkillian]

Nah- it's ok. It's my left arm, not my right so it's all good It's about the only place I'm ticklish now though cause of it though. It may eventually heal but... :/

Yes... Vampire Bella. She made the fans sweet it out ,that's for sure. I bet the Bella fans will be frothing at the mouth in joy.

[KatieHal]

Oh-hahhaha! Nice

Also, yeah, ouch! Glad it hasn't deterred you from donating blood.

[Enchantermon]

I'm still waiting for this.

Waitwaitwait.....Edward does what?!

[KatieHal]

Yep! That happens!

[MikPal]

Yes... Vampire Bella. She made the fans sweet it out ,that's for sure.

Wait, being pale makes you a vampire in the Twilight zone?

[Haids1987]

I'm still waiting for this.

Waitwaitwait.....Edward does what?!

Yep! That happens!

Wait, which shocking Edwardism is he referring to?  Him being a controlling stalker d*****?  Sparkling in the sunlight?  Texting his girlfriend while he's on the battlefield?  Oh, the possibilities!

[Enchantermon]

Yep! That happens!

Well, I was on the fence about giving the first book a shot. But that's just too wrong on so many levels...

[Haids1987]

Yes... Vampire Bella. She made the fans sweet it out ,that's for sure.

Wait, being pale makes you a vampire in the Twilight zone?

Vampires are pale.  Bella is pale.  Therefore, Bella is a vampire.

(Posted on: August 10, 2011, 06:07:45 PM)

Yep! That happens!

Well, I was on the fence about giving the first book a shot. But that's just too wrong on so many levels...

You're killing me, Smalls!  What is so shocking?! 

[KatieHal]

I believe he is referring to what the soldier remarks on at the very end of the clip, when he's reading Breaking Dawn.