Brown hair? really? and I thought blondes have more fun... :P
Quote from: copycat on December 12, 2003, 05:01:59 PMAbout the hair thing, recently a scientific study concluded men preffered women with long, thick and brown hair.
Well, I guess two out of three ain't bad. :-\ No wonder I can't get a date. ;)
Peace & Luv, Liz
omg, brown hair? seriously?
hahah I thought the same as storm did, I thought blonds were more popular!, but where was that comment taken from copycat? It could also be a cultural thing, I dont know, it doesnt sounds american to me ;)
Florida State University!!, so it was a research done inside usa, the amazing fact is
<<It's biological. Men are programmed to find a fertile mate, and lead researcher Dr. Kelley Kline thinks long, thick hair is a signal that a woman is strong, young, and healthy. This is the first research to look solely at hair length--and no other facial features--to measure female sex appeal.>>
I seriously never saw it that way myself, I mean that healthy was supposed to be an standart that meant that way, I thought it was more of a subjective idea?
not just that but also this
<<"Men preferred brunettes over blondes. "At least in our study, gentlemen do not prefer blondes. They prefer brunettes," Kline told Reuters. "Its kind of an interesting finding, considering that in our society we concentrate on the blonde. It's so pervasive.">>
How did they took part of this sample to come to this results?, maybe the portion they did manage to gather was all alike, so it may be representative of the community of Florida State University around people of 27 years old range.
I think it does rules :P but I think its not representative of a general statement IMO
Quote from: Say on December 13, 2003, 03:22:29 PMI seriously never saw it that way myself, I mean that healthy was supposed to be an standart that meant that way, I thought it was more of a subjective idea?
I think you'de be surprised how many things concerning mating are purely biological.
Quote from: Say on December 13, 2003, 03:22:29 PMHow did they took part of this sample to come to this results?, maybe the portion they did manage to gather was all alike, so it may be representative of the community of Florida State University around people of 27 years old range.
Well, normally in scientific studies they take a varied representative portion of the community, but in this case the average age of every participant was 27, so that's not varied. Normally, these finding should apply to 27 year-olds around the world.
EDIT: Quote error
Actually, forget the blondes, I'm surprised that red wasn't listed as the fave color. It's so exotic and sexy! But then, I adore red hair on both men and women, so I may be biased. ;D
As for the length thing, I'm definitely doomed. As much as I harp on the whole "short hair is easier to take care of" bit, the truth is deep down I'd love to have nice long, elegant, luxorious hair... except for the small fact that my hair is none of those things when it's long. Instead it's dull straight, limp, and ends up greasy-looking by the end of the day, thanks to my oily skin and scalp. :P Whereas when I keep my hair short it's wavy, has volume, and the greasiness doesn't show badly until the next morning (by which time I need to shower for the day anyway).
So, I guess men find short hair boring or unattractive or something... except that if my hair was long it would still be boring and unattractive. Damned if you do, damned if you don't, I guess.
Of course, if every hetero young woman jumped on the bandwagon and cut their hair, guys would be forced to adapt! J/K. :suffer:
OK, so this was just a rant from a rather lonely woman. Don't mind me. :P
Peace & Luv, Liz
I think both lengths of hair are cute, and any color is fine.
Quote from: Storm on December 14, 2003, 01:41:03 AMwhereas nowdays thinner=healthier=beautiful ::)
The fact that thin women are featured in advertisements doesn't mean they're all healthy.
I myself am thin by biology, can't get fat (yet, but don't try hard either). Also, biology is one thing, sociology (if that's right, I'm not very good at -iologies) is another. They kind of intermingle a lot of the time. 8)
Quote from: copycat on December 14, 2003, 03:02:59 PM
Quote from: Storm on December 14, 2003, 01:41:03 AMwhereas nowdays thinner=healthier=beautiful ::)
The fact that thin women are featured in advertisements doesn't mean they're all healthy.
Ah, but her point is, it doesn't have anything to do with whether or not those women actually are healthy, but with male *perception* of whether or not they're healthy. So indeed, there may be a little biology involved, but sociology can be a far more powerful factor at times. Now we need to just really figure out which is which here. ;)
Peace & Luv, Liz
I don't know about that whole thinner=healthier=beautiful thing. Too thin is disgusting IMO. When when you can see someone's ribs and boney arms, it's a definitely not beautiful to me. I don't know any guys that fantasize about annorexic girls, yet there are so many girls out there that wish they were. :-\
Well but anyhow, you know like everyone has sort of like somewhat favorite features even though that they wont be related at all into looks. And I do think many men DO like all those skinny corpses :D, if they didnt like it why would they want them so badly anyways? its like a standart into "good looks" nowdays, its a bit ridiculous that beauty = thin (I dont agree), then the thinner the prettier or something, but oh well :-\
I've seen classmates drool over horrible fugly girls just for the sake they are freaking thin, and hell even being thin hahaha that doesnt means they have a good body! well IMHO, to me thin does not gives beauty :P, but apparently boney its the hottest thing :D lol
Red-heads clearly have more fun ;) I reap all the benefits of redhead fun and brunette sensibility. It's a great world I live in! ;D
And yeah, honestly, some weight on a person is much better than looking like Paris Hilton, who I think isn't attractive at all. Blech.
Funny - this artcicle *says* guys prefer long hair. Now, a number of my old boyfriends have said they like long hair. But I have short hair, and I dated most of them for a good long while and quite happily as well. So I think whatever people 'say' they prefer is a load of BS.
Let's be honest, looks are nice, but personality is really what's clutch.
I don't understand the whole "thin is in" concept either. Certainly a person should strive to be whatever the ideal body mass is for their height... but that could be thin for one person, and not-thin for another.
Personally I think women should have curves... and I'm not just saying that because I have curves. :) I find well-proportioned curvy women to be far more appealing to look at than women who are either bony, or who are busty but don't have correctly-proportioned waists and/or hips to match. (I mean, like Pamela Anderson... she looks like if you pushed on her shoulders too hard her torso would snap off. :P ) Now, say, Kate Winslet in Titanic, on the other hand... very nice.
Peave & Luv, Liz
I love proportions... ;D It really looks nice when things just seem to fit, and look natural. I prefer spheres of affection to be more body build related than whether someone chose to have tons of "special" surgery. Of course, there's also girls who happen to be skinny AND have very large spheres of affection naturally, but it still doesn't always look right. Same goes for the rear, no sense in putting all your weight in one place. ;)
Like I said, I focus on the hair and the rest of the head, take a quick look at the front spheres (of affection) and then go back up.
Take for example our new National Miss (Belgium), who was on a show on tv recently. I'm pretty sure the camere zoomed out a few times thus showing her spheres of affection, but I was so mesmorized (?sp) by her pretty long hair I didn't even notice those. Some of my work colleagues obviously did, because they say they're 'filled' (those spheres).
Ofcourse, personality is way more important than the outside, that's why internet is so great for dating, you don't have to show yourself if you don't want to so first you meet the personality and then the appearance. That is why I don't bother Jeysie having short hair, her personality clearly compensates the lack of hair length. :-*
I dislike internet dating now because it seems too focused on date-right-away!! And that's not how I work. I fall for people I am friends with first, and I dislike the 'pressure' to just date this person and whatnot.
Waaaaaay back in the day when I first got the internet I had one of those relationships...which was actually a friends first thing, but also in the long run got me into a whole lotta trouble with my folks (for really no reason, because I did know that this guy was for real and not some psycho 50-year-old rapist/killer), but I never met him in real life. Ah well...I learned a lot from it, and I don't regret any of it, and that's the important part.
Quote from: copycat on December 24, 2003, 04:58:13 PMa) I was just trying to tell you that it's a combination of appearance and personality.
And I still don't quite buy it. I've had a large number of male best friends over the years who were quite fond of me... if personality had anything to do with it, then at least one of them would have wanted to date me, you would think, instead of always asking advice on how to get one of the local neighborhood "hot chicks" to date them.
Quote from: copycat on December 24, 2003, 04:58:13 PMb) I didn't say you were ugly, just that your hair's too short for my visual taste.
Well, same thing, since I'm incapable of having attractive long hair. :P
Urgh, sorry if I sound all sour, it's just that it's always been extremely frustrating being a woman who loves men, but men are never interested in her. Plus I had the joyous experience of being best friends with a woman who, despite not being IMHO all that much prettier than I, nevertheless could get any guy to fall in love with her just by existing, I swear. Which is why I found it hard to believe men prefer brunettes... she had red hair and green eyes... that *had* to have been it. :P
Peace & Luv, Liz
Quote from: Jeysie on December 24, 2003, 05:19:54 PMI've had a large number of male best friends over the years who were quite fond of me... if personality had anything to do with it, then at least one of them would have wanted to date me, you would think, instead of always asking advice on how to get one of the local neighborhood "hot chicks" to date them.
You obviously haven't had a me-type of man as a best friend (yet). Trust me, they're not all like that. :-* Besides, I don't know any neighborhood 'hot chicks'. ;D
Quote from: Jeysie on December 24, 2003, 05:19:54 PMWhich is why I found it hard to believe men prefer brunettes... she had red hair and green eyes... that *had* to have been it. :P
Red hair is not
that much different from brown hair as you might think. The color of the eyes I don't look at either.
Quote from: copycat on December 25, 2003, 02:13:47 PMRed hair is not that much different from brown hair as you might think. The color of the eyes I don't look at either.
Well, perhaps men in MA have different hormonal cues or something. There was, IMHO, only two main differences between us... her red hair and green eyes vs. my brown and brown, and she was about 20-30lbs thinner. Baffled me to no end. (And considering that I've never been anything more than a bit chubby, I can't believe that last would account for her high desirablity and my apparent zero desirability...)
I've never quite been able to figure out why men are uninterested in me. I've never had any problems attracting any number of devoted male *friends* to me, so apparently I'm fine personality-wise.
And looks-wise... well, for one, I've seen plenty of women as pretty as or plainer than I who have boyfriends or husbands. For two, I've had men flirt with me who were only interested in sex, and I've also had men flirt with me who were in their 30's or older. (and oddly enough, thought I was in their "age bracket"... at least, they always backed off *really* fast when they found out how old I really was...) But I've never had any men my age flirt with me who were interested in dating me.
I just don't get it. If I'm not unpleasant to be around, and I'm (assumably) not heinous-looking, then what's the deal? After all, my (lone) ex-boyfriend never had any complaints in how I treated him, or the, erm, physical side of things...
Peace & Luv, Liz
Quote from: Jeysie on December 25, 2003, 02:57:16 PMand I've also had men flirt with me who were in their 30's or older. (and oddly enough, thought I was in their "age bracket"... at least, they always backed off *really* fast when they found out how old I really was...) But I've never had any men my age flirt with me who were interested in dating me.
You have anything against men in their 30's? :-X
Besides, what's age got to do with anything? I've got a male colleague who's dating a women a lot older than him, and one of my female colleagues is living together with a man a lot older than her and they seem to be pretty comfortable with the situation. Now that I've heard your voice, even I'm baffled why men don't seem to be interested in dating you. Even your voice alone should be good enough to make them, I believe it would me. :-* And that, together with your wonderful personality makes everything else unimportant, even my hair length-fetish. :-[
have you ever considered it may be also the social circles you may frequent instead of yourself? I mean, I dont think there is anything wrong with you per se, I do believe everyone sort of fits better in some places than others, in general you have to admit men around our age are usually really stupid :P (no offense here, lol) but I think sometimes men are just... narrow mind sometimes, untill actually grow out of things and get to settle down or stuff, the problem also I think women get to mature faster than men, which for exactly I see totally normal you would relate with someone in his 30's since, you do have a lot to offer personally speaking, well its my opinion, you do have a personality, something not many women in their 20ish can say, many just take a lot of time trying to define and redefine themselves, maybe thats a bit intimidating also? I dont know myself haha, I feel as unattractive and unwanted as you do, thats why I share this few words with you because I know what it feels like to wonder whats wrong or whats missing, its not entirely about physical and its not entirely about personality, I think those things sometimes goes beyond our reach, and thats why I mentioned that before, my 2 cents anyways. :/
Quote from: copycat on December 25, 2003, 03:33:37 PMYou have anything against men in their 30's? :-X
Besides, what's age got to do with anything? I've got a male colleague who's dating a women a lot older than him, and one of my female colleagues is living together with a man a lot older than her and they seem to be pretty comfortable with the situation.
Well, I have no doubt that some people are quite content with dating someone far older than they. But I...
I find I can't be truly attracted to someone unless, among a couple other things:
One, I have to be able to relate to them/understand them. If someone has vastly different personality traits/tastes/beliefs/values/etc. than I, then I might still enjoy being good friends with them, but there won't be any real romantic connection. (Which is why my ex-boyfriend is my *ex*-boyfriend, actually.) "Opposites attract" has never been my cup of tea.
Two, I have to feel I'm on the same "level" with them in terms of maturity, life experience, emotional "power", etc. I don't like feeling significantly inferior or superior to a potential mate. (Or to a potential close friend, for that matter.)
A 30-something guy or older is likely to have more life experience, wiser thought process, maturity, etc. than I. So if I was in that sort of experience I'd always feel like "the kid"... not the sort of relationship I'm interested in. (In fact, I usually feel like "the kid" around the older men I'm just friends with, which is bad enough.) I need someone just to love me and experience life with me, not take care of me or protect me. If a guy's already experienced all the stuff that I am currently experiencing, and all the stuff that's new to me is old hat to him, it's just condescending-feeling and depressing. In fact, in many ways I feel vastly inferior to my *roommate*, and he's only 3 years older than I am. :P
Conversely, if a 30-something guy or older is actually *my* age maturity/experience level, it ergo means he's immature and inexperienced for *his* age level, which I usually find to be kind of a turn-off.
Not to mention the fact that, as I said, once the older men who flirted with me found out my real age, they were no longer interested anyway.
Quote from: Say on December 25, 2003, 03:39:52 PMhave you ever considered it may be also the social circles you may frequent instead of yourself? I mean, I dont think there is anything wrong with you per se, I do believe everyone sort of fits better in some places than others, in general you have to admit men around our age are usually really stupid :P
Well... I'm a geek, I'm attracted to geeks, and I like being friends with geeks, so I usually, well, try to hang out with geeks. So if geeky guys aren't going be interested in me... well, I'm toast. I could never date a "sterotypical jock" or a "ditzy" guy without going completely insane. Besides, any guy who didn't have a high-functioning brain would just have his eyes start glazing over when I opened my mouth, anyway... and not in a good way, either.
Peace & Luv, Liz
I'll just interject here as the seventeen year old who's been mistaken online for a person 10-15 years older than he really is, and thus has had many beautiful flirtations, attractions, et cetera that have turned to dust once my real age is discovered.
This is where I'm screwed. The average 17 year old girl (from my experience) is one or more of three things:
1. Overly randy
2. Under educated
3. Shares few to none of my interests
And more often than not, it's all three. All the women that I'm interested in are much older than me, but it still wouldn't work because of my age. People aren't interested in dating people substantially younger than them, from my experience, except for a short-term fling (which I don't want).
Uh, yeah, what was my point? None of the good women want me. Yeah, that sums it up.
Quote from: KlingonPansy on December 25, 2003, 04:39:28 PMUh, yeah, what was my point? None of the good women want me. Yeah, that sums it up.
Where were you 7 years ago when I was 17, Mikey? ;)
Peace & Luv, Liz
BTW, I *hate* my voice. It sounds so bland and little girly and ditzy to my ears. I wish I had a more mature, intellectual, alto and "sensual" sounding voice. :P
Peace & Luv, Liz
Quote from: Jeysie on December 25, 2003, 04:50:17 PM
Quote from: KlingonPansy on December 25, 2003, 04:39:28 PMUh, yeah, what was my point? None of the good women want me. Yeah, that sums it up.
Where were you 7 years ago when I was 17, Mikey? ;)
Peace & Luv, Liz
With a crush on Lauren Benbrook, who was only four years older than me. (winking smiley)