I demand satisfaction!

[Master of Ceremonies]

The rules are simple. Forumers with a death wish - or simply those who have incurred another's displeasure - will take to the field of honour. Weapons, methods*, seconds and limits must be specified in an initial post here. The duel will end when I determine the victor or one party surrenders. The only people allowed to post in this thread while a duel is on are the ones directly involved in the duel: the two duelists, the two seconds, the insulted party, I, and possibly a surgeon or funeral director.

Weapons
Historical weapons included rapiers, dueling foils and daggers, and pistols. People sometimes dueled with billiard balls and, in one case, with hot air balloons. For our purposes, the challenged duelist may decide whether the duel shall be fought with rhyming insults, non-rhyming insults, or some other form of linguistic weaponry.



*Some may find that they wish to have special methods or additions, such as the use of insults in accompaniment with rapiers.

[darthkiwi]

Stika, aka Gonz! I hereby challenge you in defence of milady Deloria's honour!

My second shall be Delling. Name yours.

We shall duel with rapiers and insults, ala Monkey Island.

[stika]

If you wish to fight then so be it.

but I warn you:

"Every enemy I've met I've annihilated"

[darthkiwi]

With your breath, I'm sure they all suffocated!

Ha! I have never seen such clumsy swordplay!

[stika]

You would have, but you were always running away!

I can't rest 'til you're exterminated!

[Master of Ceremonies]

Stika must nominate a second to take his place in the event of his death or refusal to fight on.

[stika]

I choose... Say

[Master of Ceremonies]

The duel may continue.

[darthkiwi]

Then perhaps, sir, you should switch to decaffeinated.

Sir, I declare: I shall hound you night and day!

[stika]

Then be a good dog, Sit! Stay!

Your mother wears a toupee!

[darthkiwi]

Come on, that was so cliché.

Your looks would make pigs nauseated!

[Say]

Wait what D:

*karate moves*


St1ka likes to steal Cesar's underwear! no wait, I was supposed to duel with darthkiwi, right?


DARTHKIWI SECRETLY READS AND CAPTIONS LOLCATS ON DAILY BASIS - He says "ME" and "I" are like a disgusting secret love affair that can be interchangeable in sentences! ...and giggles while he thinks about it D:

[Deloria]

Is this true? You disgust me. We can no longer be together and you have no business fighting for my honour. I declare this over.

[Master of Ceremonies]

The duel is over. Honour has been satisfied, according to the initiant.

[darthkiwi]

Say! I challenge you to a duel (or maybe we were already having one?) for MAKING MY AWESOME GIRLFRIEND BREAK UP WITH ME!

*sadface*

Again I nominate Delling as my second! You may choose the weapons, though I assume you will be using those baseless insults that you have been boldly throwing around?

[Say]

AMG, sorry that was a bit of a damn overkill right there


Alright, alright... I'll go easy.

You look like Cesar would look like as Erica WITHOUT shaving! D:

Evidence, DUN DUN DUUUUNN:

[darthkiwi]

How would you know what I look like? YOU HAVE NEVER SEEN MY FACE! HA! Your blow? PARRIED!

I'm sorry, was that an insult or were you just opening your mouth? I couldn't tell. I've met worthier opponents at the breakfast table!

[snabbott]

Hahahaha! My Cez-Erica picture!

[Oldbushie]

Sausages inna bun two for a dolla! And that's cutting me own throat!

[darthkiwi]

@Oldbushie: Good to see people vending for the crowd