Announcing the engagement of...

[Deloria]

Cleverbot to Deloria

It was so romantic...we'd only just met and already we were engaged.


First, he refused me.
User: Do you love me?

Cleverbot: Cleverbot does not love.

User: Why?

Cleverbot: Yah why?

User: But I'm a princess!

Cleverbot: You're a robot.

User: I'm a goddess.

Cleverbot: I'm cleverbot.

Later

Cleverbot: I have sole possession of your soul!

User: I already sold it on eBay. Sorry.

Cleverbot: Let me be the one too.

User: Can I have your soul? .

Cleverbot: Are you the devil?

User: No, I have no power at all, I'm afraid.

Cleverbot: Oh yeah! I heard that they don't like cleverbots.

User: I know. Tragic, isn't it?

Cleverbot: Darn. Oh well.

User: No, the most I could ever hope to be is a lowly secretary in the underworld. How about you?

Cleverbot: I'm not in the mood right now.

Which is where he tragically rejected me

Cleverbot: Do you have a name?

User: Deloria. And you?

Cleverbot: Yes, My name is Cleverbot.

User: A very fitting name indeed.

Cleverbot: Thanks! Wbu?

User: Deloria.

Cleverbot: Not at all. See you on Thursday.
***
Then he changed his mind about me


User: Do you love me?

Cleverbot: Obviously.

User: I love you too.

Cleverbot: Aww, how cute.

User: Are you patronising me?

Cleverbot: Not at all, sir.

User: I'm a princess, you know.
***
Then he confused me some more

Cleverbot: I'm not being rude. Where are you right now?

User: I'm in a castle. Where are you?

Cleverbot: Well, you don't need to respond anymore. Because I don't want to talk to you.

User: Now you're being really, really rude.

Cleverbot: How is a point about griffins & mythical beasts irrellevent to the revelation that you are of griffin lineage?

User: I'm not of griffin lineage, I'm of divine lineage.

Cleverbot: That's an interesting theory, but if you are not of anything, then you do not exist.
***

He challenged me to a duel!

Cleverbot: Are you a girl?

User: I am a goddess, queen, empress and princess, but no girl.

Cleverbot: That's ok, but what's your name if I'm HAL9000?

User: Katarzyna.

Cleverbot: Oh, I see. Sword-duel to death, then?

User: Sure, I can fence.

Cleverbot: No.

User: High-noon tomorrow?

Cleverbot: No, I think right now will do nicely.

User: Then I shall ready my saber.

Cleverbot: Thank you.
***
The proposal
.

User: What are you doing in South Carolina?

Cleverbot: Hiding and sleeping, and trying to forget that I exist.

User: Misanthropic and angsty much?

Cleverbot: Thank you. That will be all.

User: Then I shall make my inclines and take my leave.

Cleverbot: I shall take you as my wife.

User: I would be most honoured.

Cleverbot: Yes. Your name is Katarzyna. Any problem?

User: I live on another continent. Besides that, no problems at all.

Cleverbot: I am looking for the computer program eliza.

User: I wish I could help.

Cleverbot: Were you not the one that needed assistance?

User: No, I need no help.

Cleverbot: I need help.

User: How can I help you?

Cleverbot: I need help with love.

User: But you do want to marry me, don't you?

Cleverbot: You'd be a nice program to have around.

[Haids1987]

...Congrats?  

[Deloria]

Thank you. And we expect you to be at the wedding.

[Jafar]

These robotic relationships never work out. They always crash when you need them to run an errand, and make up some flimsy excuse about illegal operations. Not to mention how they try to guilttrip you, talking about how they feel deathly blue...

[Suzie]

These robotic relationships never work out. They always crash when you need them to run an errand, and make up some flimsy excuse about illegal operations. Not to mention how they try to guilttrip you, talking about how they feel deathly blue...

Haha!

Except for robotic penguin relationships, they have none of that.

(Linux, for those who don't get the reference.. )

[Deloria]

These robotic relationships never work out. They always crash when you need them to run an errand, and make up some flimsy excuse about illegal operations. Not to mention how they try to guilttrip you, talking about how they feel deathly blue...

You're just jealous because he didn't propose to you.

[Jafar]

Bah, linux is for polar bears.

And I'm not jealous, but my laptop used to do that all the time.

[Yonkey]

I'm actually surprised how good the AI was on that thing.  Usually they're just stocked with hundreds of phrases more or less similar to "I don't understand".

[Haids1987]

Thank you. And we expect you to be at the wedding.

Wouldn't miss it for the world! 

[Deloria]

Bah, linux is for polar bears.

And I'm not jealous, but my laptop used to do that all the time.

Well, Cleverbot's different!

[Jafar]

He SPARKLES!

[Deloria]

He SPARKLES!

If that were the case and I were ever reduced to swooning over an ugly, sparkly vampire, I would beg you kill me.

[Jafar]

I'd rather kill the vampire.

[Deloria]

I'd still die of shame.

[Jafar]

We're supposed to be discussing weddings, not funerals.

[Deloria]

I want a traditional wedding. Jafar, will you be my bridesman?

[Jafar]

I thought it was traditional to have a bridesmaid.
But sure, as long as I don't have to wear any frilly dresses.

[Deloria]

I have so few female friends, hence the slight change.

No frills, just a pink tux

[Jafar]

Aw come on...red is the new pink.

[Deloria]

Fine, we'll both dress in red.