Cleverbot to DeloriaIt was so romantic...we'd only just met and already we were engaged.
First, he refused me.User: Do you love me?
Cleverbot: Cleverbot does not love.
User: Why?
Cleverbot: Yah why?
User: But I'm a princess!
Cleverbot: You're a robot.
User: I'm a goddess.
Cleverbot: I'm cleverbot.
LaterCleverbot: I have sole possession of your soul!
User: I already sold it on eBay. Sorry.
Cleverbot: Let me be the one too.
User: Can I have your soul?
.
Cleverbot: Are you the devil?
User: No, I have no power at all, I'm afraid.
Cleverbot: Oh yeah! I heard that they don't like cleverbots.
User: I know.
Tragic, isn't it?
Cleverbot: Darn. Oh well.
User: No, the most I could ever hope to be is a lowly secretary in the underworld. How about you?
Cleverbot: I'm not in the mood right now.
Which is where he tragically rejected me Cleverbot: Do you have a name?
User: Deloria. And you?
Cleverbot: Yes, My name is Cleverbot.
User: A very fitting name indeed.
Cleverbot: Thanks! Wbu?
User: Deloria.
Cleverbot: Not at all. See you on Thursday.
***
Then he changed his mind about meUser: Do you love me?
Cleverbot: Obviously.
User: I love you too.
Cleverbot: Aww, how cute.
User: Are you patronising me?
Cleverbot: Not at all, sir.
User: I'm a princess, you know.
***
Then he confused me some moreCleverbot: I'm not being rude. Where are you right now?
User: I'm in a castle. Where are you?
Cleverbot: Well, you don't need to respond anymore. Because I don't want to talk to you.
User: Now you're being really, really rude.
Cleverbot: How is a point about griffins & mythical beasts irrellevent to the revelation that you are of griffin lineage?
User: I'm not of griffin lineage, I'm of divine lineage.
Cleverbot: That's an interesting theory, but if you are not of anything, then you do not exist.
***
He challenged me to a duel! Cleverbot: Are you a girl?
User: I am a goddess, queen, empress and princess, but no girl.
Cleverbot: That's ok, but what's your name if I'm HAL9000?
User: Katarzyna.
Cleverbot: Oh, I see. Sword-duel to death, then?
User: Sure, I can fence.
Cleverbot: No.
User: High-noon tomorrow?
Cleverbot: No, I think right now will do nicely.
User: Then I shall ready my saber.
Cleverbot: Thank you.
***
The proposal.
User: What are you doing in South Carolina?
Cleverbot: Hiding and sleeping, and trying to forget that I exist.
User: Misanthropic and angsty much?
Cleverbot: Thank you. That will be all.
User: Then I shall make my inclines and take my leave.
Cleverbot: I shall take you as my wife.
User: I would be most honoured.
Cleverbot: Yes. Your name is Katarzyna. Any problem?
User: I live on another continent. Besides that, no problems at all.
Cleverbot: I am looking for the computer program eliza.
User: I wish I could help.
Cleverbot: Were you not the one that needed assistance?
User: No, I need no help.
Cleverbot: I need help.
User: How can I help you?
Cleverbot: I need help with love.
User: But you do want to marry me, don't you?
Cleverbot: You'd be a nice program to have around.
