*inserts motor oil*
The soda machine becomes a proper robot, capable of changing between robot form and vending machine form at will. The forum quickly turns into a Michael Bay film. Linkin Park writes a new song for the occassion. A bunch of photogenic supermodel newcomers descend on the forum, mostly just to be attractive scenery. Activity on the forum is briskly edited and is restricted to explosions, teen humour, shots of helicopters flying at sunset, slo-mo 360 pans and people shouting each other's names across long distances when they're in danger. You know, like...
"ROOOOOBBBBB!!!"
"WEEEELLLLDOOOONNN!!!"
"CEEEEDDDDDRRRRIIIICCCCC!!!!"
Well, maybe not that last one.
Okay, that does it...
*launches Red Matter at the soda machine*